Thank You To My Mother ...

Yesterday, I found out that someone 

- and not just anyone, but someone I have been trying earnestly to impress -

thinks I am overweight. 

She thinks I am fat.

And do you know what thought came to me,

once the rage inside me had subsided and the tears had stopped and my heart was beating normally again and my hands weren't clenched in little fists ready to punch this "someone" square between the eyes?

I thought: thank you to my Mother.

Not that I blame my Mother for my heavy-set frame, as some girls do.

Not that my Mother passed down "big bone" genes ...

Or that somehow my plus size curves are a flaw or blessing to be attributed to her.

No. Not that kind of thank you.

Thank you to my Mother ... for loving unconditionally.

For being the kind of Mom to whom I was always beautiful;

even when I was chubby

even when I had a double-chin

even when my hair was a messy, uncontrollable frizz ball

even when my teeth were crooked and I was too chicken to get braces

even when other little girls may have been prettier than I.

I always knew I was beautiful to her. I never doubted that.

Thank you to my Mother ... 

for continuously telling me that I was - and am - perfect.

For telling me that she is proud of the weight I have lost,

but mostly proud of the character I have developed.

For raising me to believe & know that there is more than meets the eye.

Thank you to my Mother ... 

Advent Musing, Part 2

Today's Reading: Matthew 1:18-25

I love how Scripture is weaved together so picture perfectly. Yesterday's verses focused on Mary, today's focus on Joseph. I have to confess that in years past, I've been guilty of paying little attention to Joseph's role in the story. As a woman, I am more drawn to Mary every time I read the nativity story, I am quick to put myself in her shoes and try to understand the events from her perspective. This year for the first time (perhaps because I have a righteous, devoted man in my own life now), I emphasize with Joseph. I admire him.

Here was a man who chose God's will over his own reputation .. a man who was willing to put his plans and dreams and expectations on the back burner and obey the Lord. I often think of how Mary was likely scorned and rejected by the people in her village but never paused to think that Joseph, too, would have suffered. At any point, Joseph could have chosen to run. He could have chosen revenge. He didn't. Instead, he chose to sacrifice his own well-being and humble himself. Incredible.